Doing Too Much

PhD Year 1, Semester 2

If there was one word to describe the first year, second semester (January - July 2021) of my PhD, it would be oversubscribed. Yup, that’s me—doing too damn much as if pursing a full-time PhD wasn’t enough. I have always been an overachiever and highly competitive with MYSELF. I always want to “one-up” myself. I never take a moment to celebrate one accomplishment because I am always thinking about the next bigger accomplishment. I have been this way all of my life. In 2nd grade, I was reading on a 4th grade level but I asked my mom to help me read on a 6th grade level. That’s who I am. I’m never satisfied with what I’ve achieved. There’s always something more I could be doing. Or so I thought. In 36 years of carrying on like this, the PhD (or my age or both the PhD and my age) has taught me how unsustainable this is.

The second semester started with me still recovering from an operation performed in November 2020 (more on that in a future blog). I was not cleared to travel back to the UK until I was 3 months post-op (mid February 2021). Luckily, the university remained online due to the pandemic. Thus, I began the second semester as a Teacher Assistant (TA). Unlike, the USA PhD system, you are not required to conduct any teaching while pursuing the doctorate degree in the UK. It is voluntary (with the exception of getting a PhD in let’s say, Education). Not everyone pursues a PhD to go into teaching or full-time academia. Some folks have no desire to teach. I happen to be one of those who would like to do a bit of both. I hope to work full-time in industry (international development or research think tanks) while also teaching one module (referred to as a course in the USA) as an adjunct professor (or hourly paid lecturer in the UK) preferably at an HBCU like Spelman College or Howard University. For this reason, I took on a TA role or I should say roles.

I was told the best time to try teaching is during the foundation year or your final year of the PhD because you tend to have a bit more flexibility. Since I always do too much, instead of TAing for one module, I was a TA for two modules: one third year (senior level module and one first-year tutorial). I also worked on two one-off teaching presentations (sort of like guest TAing for one class each). As I was still in the USA, I had to TA on UK time (5 hours ahead) and some of my modules started as early as 4am USA time. I never completed a degree program in the UK so there was a bit more of a learning curve for me. I had to understand the grading system, teaching styles, and what is expected at university in the UK. The first-year tutorial was more demanding. There isn’t any such equivalency in the States. It is a required class for first-year students where there are a few graded assignments. The assignments were marked by me but also independently marked by a lecturer. The final grade lands somewhere between my mark and the lecturer’s. That’s another thing, in the UK system, there is anonymous marking and there is always an independent assessor to mark the work following the lecturer’s mark. The marks are averaged (somehow) and that’s the student’s final grade. Of course this is not a bullet proof measure to prevent bias grading but it helps. The tutorial class is only made up of 9-12 students so you could work out whose work belongs to who simply by context clues or process of elimination. Tutorials provide first-year students with knowledge and transferable skills related to the degree program. The tutorial program includes small group tutorials and plenary sessions, it is meant to support what is being taught in the first-year modules. It’s challenging because as the TA, you are not taking the modules alongside the students but you are tasked with helping them with what is covered in the classes.

Scheduling can be a bit tricky—by the way, in the UK, schedules are set in advance where there is no flexibility in designing your own schedule of classes. For example, all students studying a degree program (major) are taking the required degree classes in a single semester. In some cases, you can choose from a list of electives but only during certain years. Unlike the USA, undergraduate students in the UK jump straight into the degree program (major) — with the exception of Scotland, which resembles the USA system and undergraduate is four years instead of three years in other parts of the country. There’s no room for someone pursuing a biology degree to take “Introduction to Drawing” for a GPA boost. There is certainly no room for switching majors multiple times for up to two years otherwise you will have to essentially start undergraduate all over again because there are no transferrable credits because the classes are specific to the degree. Anyways, the first-year students naturally require more attention and I had to get creative running these sessions online. The university does provide weekly lesson plans but it is the TA’s responsibilities to deliver the material in a way that is engaging and fun. Thank God for my Geography cohort, three of which were also TAing. We literally handheld each other during the semester. Additionally, I continued as a Widening Participant Fellow—developing, recording teaching workshops and talks for public elementary - secondary school students. This was a one year contract so I had to continue.

By late February, I was back in the UK which was such a relief because the early morning teaching was killing me. I was awarded a scholarship to take part in a research network, Black Health and Humanities Project which required readings and to take part in a series of five two full-day academic workshops over a course of a year. The first two-day workshop began in March. By the end of March, I had applied for a 9 week research consulting internship program in which I began in mid-April. In the midst of this, I was working on independent consultancy projects of my own to financially support myself. To top it all off, I was preparing a publication launch for the second part to my children’s book series, Janjay goes Upriver.

As if I didn’t have enough on my plate, I decided to apply for a social responsibility fund at the university to support a project of my choosing. I always jump at any opportunity to help Liberia so I couldn’t just let this pass. Did you know girls in the global south miss school during their menstrual cycles simply because they cannot afford adequate sanitation protection? Liberia is no exception, not to mention how the water and sanitation issues contribute to the problem. I applied to the University of Manchester Social Responsibility Catalyst Fund and was awarded £2,500 GBP to facilitate social responsibility project which address period poverty for school aged girls in Liberia. The fund was used to produce over 800 sustainable reusable pads to keep girls from missing one week of school every month due to unaffordable sanitation pads. The fund also supported the salaries of women entrepreneur seamstress who locally produce sustainable pads. I worked alongside a Liberian NGO Urmonae Health Liberia and Payless Pads. Urmonae Health equips Liberian adolescents with tools and knowledge they need to make informed decisions about their bodies as they transition into adulthood. Executive Director, Fenny Taylor, administered the pads and delivered workshops on hygiene health. Payless Pads, is a social enterprise making menstrual hygiene management affordable headed by Augustine Kou. The company supports women employment who create the eco-friendly pads. Although it was another item added to my to-do list, it was certainly well worth it to work with two Liberians making a difference in the country.

Needless to say, by mid-May, I was exhausted. I just wanted to get to July 5 — which was the date of my annual review, otherwise known as the upgrade. In the UK, a PhD upgrade or review happens between year 1 and year 2. Basically, when you begin a three-year PhD program in the UK, the first year is your opportunity to demonstrate you have what it takes to successfully complete the PhD. The upgrade is when your supervisors and an outside examiner (someone within the university) assess your entire year’s output to determine whether you have done enough work in the first year to complete the program in a reasonable time. I had to submit my final proposal and other forms in advance of the assessment. The day of the annual review is a conversation with the external assessor. While, your supervisors are present, they are not allowed to interject. They may only observe the conversation between yourself and the assessor. A series of questions are provided in advance to frame the discussion, mainly about the work that has been submitted but also about your overall experience. In the US, this would be the time between year 2 and year 3 (after comprehensive exams and all coursework) where you have completed everything but the dissertation (courses/modules, training, timeline, solid proposal). After the upgrade, this is when you officially matriculate from a PhD student/researcher to PhD/doctoral candidate. I am pleased to call myself a doctoral candidate! My panel was so impressed with my work and how I managed to deliver such high quality work while also doing the most!

I have accomplished a lot this year. My colleagues, supervisors, and friends don’t know how I did it. Heck, I don’t know how I did it. I hardly took any breaks and I rarely went out— largely due to the Pandemic. Even though I survived this year, I realized this is not sustainable. What is the point of killing yourself? What do I have to prove? If I want to enjoy this PhD experience, I have to have balance or else I won’t complete the journey. A part from the extra curricular activities, I also need money to survive. I don’t have the luxury, like most students in my cohort, not to work. I am a self-funded student but I am working to change that in the upcoming year. Year 2 is all about data collection and analysis. I’m looking forward to moving to Liberia where my fieldwork will commence in 2022. Looking forward to documenting my journey.

Year 1 of the PhD

Presented at a London School of Economics and Political Science (LSE) conference.
Widening Participation Fellow - Develop and deliver sessions to inspire and engage primary school and college students from across Greater Manchester.
Had a major operation.
Published article on “Global Water Alliance” Blog.
Awarded Wellcome Trust scholarship to take part in Black Humanities Project.
Published Article in the “Manchester Historian”.
Teacher Assistant (3rd Year Module/Seminar and 1st Year Tutorial) + two one-off sessions
9 Weeks Research Consultant
Published the sequel to children’s book - (U.S State Department bought the translation rights for a second time. French translation book to be distributed by U.S embassies).
Started an e-commerce business to sell my published books and book apparel.
Awarded funding from university to manage a project that addresses period poverty in Liberia. Over 800 girls have eco friendly sanitation pads for a year and won’t have to miss school during their periods because they can’t afford adequate protection.
Published article for the The Water Center at the University of Pennsylvania. (For the alumni section)
Mentor a Black student at my university.
Run a #blackgirlmagic book club with dynamic women. @africanbabesbookclub. Follow our page.
Run personal blog. www.chantalvictoria.com.
Secured an internship with international organisation in Liberia for my upcoming fieldwork.
Provide research consulting services.
Submitted a poster which was selected, won a prize, and featured in the Postgraduate Methods for Change Gallery.
Passed my upgrade.

~Signed Chantal Victoria — Writer, Publisher, and Academic.